If you ever felt guilty saying it to your kids… don’t.

I know many books on parenting suggest that parents should never say that to their kids. Rather parents  should negotiate or discuss things with their children. You should ask your children to think, choose and decide. According to those books, this approach will help your children to become more responsible and independent.

Maybe so. But I often find myself arguing with JackJack, my seven-year old, instead of reasoning with him. I wonder if you have the same experience too.

My Jackjack has only one criteria: as long as it’s not dangerous according to him, he will do it.

Often times, I just want to say to him: You do it because I said so; but I felt a bit guilty because I feel like I am being an authoritarian father. Uugh.. I definitely don’t want to be one.

Well, that burden was lifted when I read a book by John Rosemond, a psychologist, who wrote that it is perfectly okay and sometimes even necessary to say Because I said so to your children.

You have to be able to recognize what’s going on when your child ask you why. If it is a genuine request for information, then you can explain your reasons to them. However, if it’s a power contest, then you should be firm and tell them: Because I said so…

What do you think?